Dear Mother Nature,
I would like to unsubscribe from my monthly subscription effective immediately,
- Why does it feel like there are tiny demons jumping up and down on my uterus?
- Don’t sneeze don’t sneeze don’t sne… Ew.
- Why is it sooooo hot?
- WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT????
- Lemme just look back at this chair I’ve been sitting on… yup, all good.
- “Check me”
- Not sure if I want chocolate or doughnuts, or what about a glazed doughnut cut in half with a slab of dairy milk whole nut in the middle, like a doughchoc sandwich.
- These spots are so painful
- Why did I eat all that chocolate? That will definitely make my spots worse!
- Ummmm ok I can’t do my jeans up- HELLO BLOATING
- Been laying down here a while, I know what will happen when I stand up… I’ve got to get up… Here goes… Ew.
- Been in bed all night with white sheets… woken up on the Japanese flag.
- I HAVE JUST GOT OUT THE SHOWER CAN I HAVE 10 SECONDS TO GET THE TAMPON PLEASE?!!!!
- Why is my boyfriend so annoying? I wish HE could have this pain then he would understand
- I’ve just googled period pains and it’s genuinely my body having mini contractions… PASS ME THE GAS AND AIR PLEASE!
I would like to point out that my boyfriend is infact fantastic with period support and goes to the shop at 10pm to get me chocolate and pineapple and rubs my belly and makes me hot water bottles at 7:30am soooo I can’t really complain but he does still annoy me like… stop trying to touch me…
Have you ever thought any of these things? What else goes through your mind during ‘that time’ of the month?